He really is, and I am amazed every single day of the ways that He works.
Just a quick post, because I have a lot of reading to do:
Tonight I went to the International Justice Mission (IJM) meeting. I've been planning on going but then was about not to because of the forementioned homework, but I felt led by the Holy Spirit to go so I went and wow. It was a beautiful thing to see people be so honest and heartfelt and full of love for so many people that just are not being loved. Honestly I thought that the people there were going to be making idols of their causes, but first and foremost they exist as a organization to glorify the Lord. I think I nearly broke down in tears about five times, and was convicted of a great need and urgency, for my complete obedience and total surrender, and so many other things... it is really hard to process and I need to go do reading and then pray and pray and pray and probably cry.
Yeah. Hope all you people have had a good day and are rejoicing in the Lord.
Showing posts with label changes. Show all posts
Showing posts with label changes. Show all posts
Thursday, September 4, 2008
Monday, July 21, 2008
sad realizations
Lately I have been feeling unhealthy and... gross. Really. I've wanted to lose weight before, and have been moderately successful, but always fall off track.
The initial problems are with my eating habits. I eat very unhealthy. I eat because I am bored, anxious, and in front of the TV (bad...). If I'm distracted all day playing the Sims 2 or doing stuff, I won't eat as much. But otherwise, I just get bored and eat. This is bad. I have also noticed that since I got my job (January) and moved into this apartment (March 23rd) I've been eating a lot of junk food. I used to never eat chips, cookies, candy, etc. At work, I could have whatever I wanted, so, I took what was tasty instead of what was healthy (sometimes). The real problem is with this apartment. We ALWAYS have baked goods. Between the cookie addictions of my three roommates, the cake making, the random goodies brought from wherever, and the infamous junk drawer (a whole kitchen drawer FULL of crap from one of my roommates' mom), I have easy access to this junk. At my parents house we barely had real food, nonetheless junk food...
So I have been trying to consciously make an effort to 1) not eat because I feel like it (it may seem obvious but it's hard to not do. I was listening to that Mark Driscoll sermon that I posted about earlier and realized that I may have a worship problem [not "food addiction" - that I choose eating to please myself rather than eating and enjoying the food that the Lord has blessed us with in a healthy way that will honor our bodies, where the Holy Spirit dwells), and 2) eat less and healthier.
Moving out of this apartment into a new one, that doesn't already have a stockpile of crap, will be great. Totally getting rid of the temptations is the best way for me to overcome a lot of things. Hopefully I can keep my fridge, freezer, and cabinets full of tasty, more filling, and more healthy items. And not chocolate and rice krispy bars and cookies and what-have-you.
For me, this means eschewing meat. Slowly I would like to have a vegetarian diet. I think I will still eat dairy products and eggs (although I found there are many substitutes for eggs in recipes. Like apple sauce or bananas. I found this out because I usually never have eggs. Egg salad can be made really tastily with chickpeas. The only thing I can think of to do with actual eggs is make omelets, hard-boiled eggs, scrambled eggs, and fried eggs.) I think that overall, doing a 180 on my eating habits will be great.
I'm also going to stop eating cold cereal. Mostly because it is not filling. I usually eat two serving sizes (one serving of cereal is so tiny...) and a little milk and then I'm hungry two hours later! I found a recipe for breakfast bars that I want to try, and I also like hot cereal, pancakes, muffins (for weekends), and shakes/fruit smoothies (for weekdays).
Today I made chickpea salad (like egg salad). I'm really excited to try it for lunch tomorrow. I was going to have it for dinner tonight but Sarah came over with two pizzas that she got. She got a job! At a pizza place. So they gave her some pizzas. She made one! She tried to make is seem like she did a terrible job but then she had a hard time telling the difference between hers and the managers... Finally we found hers because some of the pepperonis weren't flat. :P
Tomorrow, breakfast will be a banana peanut butter smoothie (I ran out of chocolate syrup...). Lunch with be chickpea salad on two pieces of wheat toast with lettuce. Snack will be... something... and dinner will be... something. I want to try making a chili. But I barely have any food here (besides bananas... I bought six pounds the other day for two dollars! freaking sweet, huh. I got two bags of the "old" bananas, which are really the ripe bananas. AKA the not greener than limes bananas. Yay.)
The secondary problems are between me and exercise. I never have liked exercising. In China, I started running with some of my friends. I looked around online at how far/fast to run and stuff, and of course, started very slowly... but I got shin splints. They hurt so bad that I could barely walk. I tried doing exercises everyday to strength my ankle muscles, the muscles on the front of the leg - all the exercises that were suggested for shin splints. And I rested. But it didn't help. Today I went out running at Tuttle Park, down by the river, and it seems like I still have the shin splints and they are back with a fiery vengeance and hurt so much. I'm going to see my doctor, I think, and ask about them.
I also hate exercising where people can see me because I suck at exercising, sweat a lot, etc. That is why I don't like gyms. I also don't want to exercise alone but haven't been successful with finding a work-out partner.
I think I should try bicycling. At Southeastern they have a gym. I'm not sure if they have a stationary bike, but I bet they do. Maybe I could use that one. At least I am trying to get in shape, right? I really think my fear of people seeing me exercise is ridiculous and totally unfounded...
I'm also planning on biking to school (why I got the apartment I did as opposed to the one that was much farther away).
So. I have 39 pounds to lose to get to my goal weight! (This goal weight that I need to lose 39 pounds to get to is not unreasonable, either. It's in the middle of the ideal weight range for women my height. I'm not trying to be skinny; I don't have skewed views as to what women need to weigh to be healthy or "normal" or attractive, even if the media tries so hard to indoctrinate me.)
It's so much. I don't know if I can bring myself to put on my blog what my weight as of tonight was. :(
At least my grades are good so far! And Russian is coming along. Kind of.
The initial problems are with my eating habits. I eat very unhealthy. I eat because I am bored, anxious, and in front of the TV (bad...). If I'm distracted all day playing the Sims 2 or doing stuff, I won't eat as much. But otherwise, I just get bored and eat. This is bad. I have also noticed that since I got my job (January) and moved into this apartment (March 23rd) I've been eating a lot of junk food. I used to never eat chips, cookies, candy, etc. At work, I could have whatever I wanted, so, I took what was tasty instead of what was healthy (sometimes). The real problem is with this apartment. We ALWAYS have baked goods. Between the cookie addictions of my three roommates, the cake making, the random goodies brought from wherever, and the infamous junk drawer (a whole kitchen drawer FULL of crap from one of my roommates' mom), I have easy access to this junk. At my parents house we barely had real food, nonetheless junk food...
So I have been trying to consciously make an effort to 1) not eat because I feel like it (it may seem obvious but it's hard to not do. I was listening to that Mark Driscoll sermon that I posted about earlier and realized that I may have a worship problem [not "food addiction" - that I choose eating to please myself rather than eating and enjoying the food that the Lord has blessed us with in a healthy way that will honor our bodies, where the Holy Spirit dwells), and 2) eat less and healthier.
Moving out of this apartment into a new one, that doesn't already have a stockpile of crap, will be great. Totally getting rid of the temptations is the best way for me to overcome a lot of things. Hopefully I can keep my fridge, freezer, and cabinets full of tasty, more filling, and more healthy items. And not chocolate and rice krispy bars and cookies and what-have-you.
For me, this means eschewing meat. Slowly I would like to have a vegetarian diet. I think I will still eat dairy products and eggs (although I found there are many substitutes for eggs in recipes. Like apple sauce or bananas. I found this out because I usually never have eggs. Egg salad can be made really tastily with chickpeas. The only thing I can think of to do with actual eggs is make omelets, hard-boiled eggs, scrambled eggs, and fried eggs.) I think that overall, doing a 180 on my eating habits will be great.
I'm also going to stop eating cold cereal. Mostly because it is not filling. I usually eat two serving sizes (one serving of cereal is so tiny...) and a little milk and then I'm hungry two hours later! I found a recipe for breakfast bars that I want to try, and I also like hot cereal, pancakes, muffins (for weekends), and shakes/fruit smoothies (for weekdays).
Today I made chickpea salad (like egg salad). I'm really excited to try it for lunch tomorrow. I was going to have it for dinner tonight but Sarah came over with two pizzas that she got. She got a job! At a pizza place. So they gave her some pizzas. She made one! She tried to make is seem like she did a terrible job but then she had a hard time telling the difference between hers and the managers... Finally we found hers because some of the pepperonis weren't flat. :P
Tomorrow, breakfast will be a banana peanut butter smoothie (I ran out of chocolate syrup...). Lunch with be chickpea salad on two pieces of wheat toast with lettuce. Snack will be... something... and dinner will be... something. I want to try making a chili. But I barely have any food here (besides bananas... I bought six pounds the other day for two dollars! freaking sweet, huh. I got two bags of the "old" bananas, which are really the ripe bananas. AKA the not greener than limes bananas. Yay.)
The secondary problems are between me and exercise. I never have liked exercising. In China, I started running with some of my friends. I looked around online at how far/fast to run and stuff, and of course, started very slowly... but I got shin splints. They hurt so bad that I could barely walk. I tried doing exercises everyday to strength my ankle muscles, the muscles on the front of the leg - all the exercises that were suggested for shin splints. And I rested. But it didn't help. Today I went out running at Tuttle Park, down by the river, and it seems like I still have the shin splints and they are back with a fiery vengeance and hurt so much. I'm going to see my doctor, I think, and ask about them.
I also hate exercising where people can see me because I suck at exercising, sweat a lot, etc. That is why I don't like gyms. I also don't want to exercise alone but haven't been successful with finding a work-out partner.
I think I should try bicycling. At Southeastern they have a gym. I'm not sure if they have a stationary bike, but I bet they do. Maybe I could use that one. At least I am trying to get in shape, right? I really think my fear of people seeing me exercise is ridiculous and totally unfounded...
I'm also planning on biking to school (why I got the apartment I did as opposed to the one that was much farther away).
So. I have 39 pounds to lose to get to my goal weight! (This goal weight that I need to lose 39 pounds to get to is not unreasonable, either. It's in the middle of the ideal weight range for women my height. I'm not trying to be skinny; I don't have skewed views as to what women need to weigh to be healthy or "normal" or attractive, even if the media tries so hard to indoctrinate me.)
It's so much. I don't know if I can bring myself to put on my blog what my weight as of tonight was. :(
At least my grades are good so far! And Russian is coming along. Kind of.
Monday, July 14, 2008
minimizing & being productive
As of now, I will no longer be watching TV for frivolous reasons. That means, I will only watch Jon & Kate + 8, Design Star, Gossip Girl, Private Practice, Grey's Anatomy, and House. Currently only Jon & Kate and Design Star are on, so that is 1.5-2 hours of TV/week (depending on Jon & Kate episode length). Also, most of the other shows are available online for viewing, so I will watch those shows online. Doing that 1) saves time because there are no commercials, and 2) prevents TV from controlling me as I can choose when I watch something, and if I want to watch it in more than one session, that is possible too.
I also got rid of 10 shirts from my closet that I don't wear anymore. Look for a post before I move showing how much stuff I will be getting rid of (or donating, trying to sell, whatever)!
My newly found free time will not be used playing video games but instead reading. Also, perhaps there will be some exercising in the form of bicycling sometime soon, if I can get a working bike.
Reading list:
The Problem of Pain
A Grief Observed
Mere Christianity
The Great Divorce
Miracles
Blue Like Jazz - Donald Miller
The Gun Seller - Hugh Laurie
interspersed with Critique of Pure Reason - Kant (I say interspersed because apparently this is some really tough stuff!)
My room feels so much bigger and more peaceful without the TV in it.
I also got rid of 10 shirts from my closet that I don't wear anymore. Look for a post before I move showing how much stuff I will be getting rid of (or donating, trying to sell, whatever)!
My newly found free time will not be used playing video games but instead reading. Also, perhaps there will be some exercising in the form of bicycling sometime soon, if I can get a working bike.
Reading list:
The Problem of Pain
A Grief Observed
Mere Christianity
The Great Divorce
Miracles
Blue Like Jazz - Donald Miller
The Gun Seller - Hugh Laurie
interspersed with Critique of Pure Reason - Kant (I say interspersed because apparently this is some really tough stuff!)
My room feels so much bigger and more peaceful without the TV in it.
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